Patent Pending: InstaNote

Picture this:

You’ve written the most amazing, life-changing, emotionally-wrenching, artistical literary masterpiece describing how you recently broke up with your girlfriend and have passed it back through the student freedom chain to your bestest friend WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN your geography teacher, Mr. Linus, swoops down like a fat bat and steals the note before your friend can seal it inside the safety of her palms.

It’s TRUE, we’ve all been in this situation.  Some of us more than once.  Some of us more than ten times.  And what SHAME we have experienced at the hands of our supposed BETTERS.

Shame because we all know what happens next.  Mr. Linus stands up in front of the class and says, “It seems that Mr. Rappaport has something he’d like to share with the class.  Let’s hear it, shall we?”

And even though you say, “No!” as loud as you can in your mind, Mr. Linus reads out what you’ve written in confidence.  He mimics your voice perfectly, down to the whine that sometimes appends your questions, that whine that you always hated but haven’t been able to get rid of.

He reproduces your margin doodles on the blackboard.  He invites criticism of your artistic style.

NEVER again, you tell yourself.  Never again.

And NOW your prayers have been ANSWERED!

New InstaNote paper will prevent you from ever having to deal with the SHAME of unwanted REVELATION ever again.

But how, you ask, does it work?

IT WORKS through the magic of space-age and cutting-edge quantum physics.  Now, using quantum teleportation, you can send notes to your friends WITHOUT having to pass the notes physically to them!

Okay, you say, that’s great.  But how does it work?

IT WORKS this way:  You and your friend both have an InstaNote paper.  When you want to write a message to your friend, you WRITE on your paper and AT THE SAME TIME your message appears on your friend’s paper!  Your friend writes you back, and her message appears on your InstaNote paper IN REAL TIME!

NO MORE subtly passing notes over your shoulder while pretending to scratch your back!  NO MORE fears that Chrissy Beckdell is going to open the note and read it instead of passing it along quickly and efficiently!  NO MORE folding notes into complicated shapes to lock the information away from eager prying eyes!

Get your very own InstaNote paper today, and never BE ASHAMED again!

InstaNote paper is not just for schoolchildren.  If you are a government or industrial spy, a military communications officer, or a deep-space astronaut, please contact your local Wealth in Advertising office to see how InstaNote can work for you!

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One Response to Patent Pending: InstaNote

  1. Caitlin says:

    This. Is. Awesome.

    Also much better than texting in class. The clicking sound kind of gives that one away.

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