On Dialogue (Reredux)

B: Today I’d like to talk about how dialogue often runs away with you.  As with many creative endeavors, you may find… (Beat.) Aren’t you going to interrupt?

A: Should I?  If I may say so, I was rather interested.

B: But you – or someone or something – always interrupts.

A: Why?

B: I don’t know!

A: There’s no reason to get excited.

B: I’m not excited.  I’m angry!

A: No reason to get that, either.

B: You’re right. I’m sorry. (Beat.) I’m calm now.

A: Do you want me to interrupt you?

B: What?

A: I can, you know.  Interrupt you.  If you want me to.

B: Why would I want that?

A: You just seemed so excited.  And even though you said you didn’t want to be interrupted… The lady doth protest too much and all that.

B: I’m not a lady.

A: Are you sure?

B: Excuse me?

A: Maybe that’s why you got so excited so suddenly.  Hormones and all.  I hear they’re nigh uncontrollable.

B: I think it’s pretty obvious I’m a man.

A: They do wonderful things with disguises these days.

B: Really.

A: And make-up.  But I guess you’d know all about that.

B: I told you, I’m not a woman!

A: There you go, getting excited again.

B: Look, could we please just get back to the subject at hand.

A: And what’s that?

B: Dialogue!  Let’s talk about dialogue.

A: Whatever you want, baby.  I’d have a dialogue with you in a hot minute.

(Scream of frustration.  Footsteps.  Door opening and closing.)

A: I’ll take that as a yes, then.

(Footsteps.  Door opening and closing.)

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